I think your trying to work me from the inside out? It doesn't solve my problems with my addict friend or addicts in my life and I'm not struggling myself with drinking but I certainly appreciate your questions which may help someone and may even help me with myself or the people in my life. I know doing the things I love always helps me. I'm a youth leader and giving back to them always helps me. I love fitness, the gym and yoga and I like walking and running and really want to do more other physical activity. I enjoy sports, my meetings, getting lost in my music, reading, writing, and I love tv and movies and the arts, I like to cook and bake and do crafts and I love to travel. I like learning. These sites also keep me sane or reading any type of recovery material. Motivation to stay clean is the life I have planned for myself now that I know the direction I am in, and making my friends and family and even "him" proud. I can't say I understand myself completely just that I keep busy and Domt want to go down the road he and some family members went down. I strive to not be like that and I also strive to make my enemies hate me even more. Embracing recovery was changing friends, not entirely, but somewhat, the gym, changing my work schedule to nights, and going to a few meetings, aside from that it was my guy friend and his family that truly opened my eyes and have them to thank.he knows I'm sober and thinks it's awesome...I was in early stages of alcoholism...my therapists both (I've changed therapists about 6 months ago) think it was a great decision for me and I am so glad I made the decision to quit, I also knew if he was gonna ever chose to be with me, my guy friend I couldn't bring any substances to the table whatsoever, and am for that reason not wanting to be with anyone who has any addiction trouble and don't want to ever go down that path again.