Originally Posted by
atalose 
You need to get to a place inside of yourself where - NO IT ISN'T FINE and that you won't cave into emotional blackmail because it's robbing you of enjoyment from life.
I would arrange to have your freinds mom watch your daughter and someone else to pick her up on Sunday morning and go with your original plans.
^^ Me too, this is the kind of stuff I had to do with my mom at points in my recovery. The stronger I've gotten, the more I've found it affects others around me like a domino.
I had to put it like this, "I'm taking DD to friend's house mom & will arrange for her pickup. No one thinks you have done or is accusing you of doing anything wrong & I'm sorry that YOU ARE CHOOSING to feel this way about this situation.... but I think if you take a step back you'll realize YOU are the only one making this a big deal."
IMO, untreated codependency can be awful to watch. I used to martyr myself to situations & call it "doing the right thing" a lot & I shudder to think of myself as that person now.