UBB

I posted back in May about my boyfriend overdosing on my Xanax and having major issues with alcohol.

Since then he has seen a therapist (6 times... before he decided $120 a month was too expensive for him).

Promised to stop drinking (I know, I know).

Here's the deal. When the May stuff was going on, I was dealing with major family things as well... My dad ended up dying of cancer in July. The weekend that my boyfriend had his issues, was the weekend my dad had come home from hospital check up where he had received a poor report card on his cancer.

While I spent 2 weeks at the hospital with my dad, my boyfriend went to Dallas. He drank at a show. And e-mailed a prostitute. Claims nothing happened. Whatever.

Week after I got home... My dad was checked into local hospital. Day he was checked in, boyfriend bought a $3.** bottle of vodka and drank it before coming to hospital to see my dad.

Since my dad passed, my boyfriend has not been supportive and has been very weird and possessive of me, even towards me spending time with my mom (I am an only child). The day of my dad's burial he said "why don't you just move in with your mom, you've spent the night there the last 5 nights anyway," etc, etc. He's also made comments re:being sad won't bring my dad back (well, duh, I know that... but it was only 3 weeks after his death that he said this).

He claims to have not had anything since then to drink (Right)... Until Friday. He had an endoscopy to check himself out (bad heartburn for 5 years) and I think my dad's cancer scared him -- esophageal caused by silent acid reflux. I brought him home afterward, which being there for him at the same place that my dad was diagnosed, was difficult. He got angry about his iPhone 6 delivery and was yelling at me and taking out his issues with his parents on me. I said, "if you're going to act like this, I'm going to go until you decide to be nice." So I left and went to my friends house. When I came home 3 hours later, he was passed out awkwardly sitting up and not breathing as normal as usual... and given that he had been under anesthesia 5 hours earlier... I woke him up. I woke up a monster. He had drank a bottle of vodka to "celebrate not having esophageal cancer" on his way home from picking up his new iPhone. He started throwing accusations at me about hooking up with someone else (I was at a girl friend's house) when I had left, etc. He slammed his legs into my lap and almost shoved me off the couch intentionally, although I held my ground. He informed me that he couldn't be the only sober person in the relationship (I was sitting there, stone cold sober) at this time as well. I have the occasional glass of wine when out with friends and he's not present (which I'm not "allowed" to even do anymore).

I am **% sure that he has bipolar disorder on top of his addiction issues. I'm walking on eggshells every single day not to ignite the rage inside of him. Last night he screamed at me in Target about pushing the cart 2 aisles over when something caught my eye -- something about common courtesy and not making him wander through the store looking like an idiot.

Leaving him is a given. I don't need anymore convincing. I hadn't wanted to have to "grieve" the relationship while I am supposed to be grieving my dad, but I can't deal anymore. I am moving back in with my mom for the time being as we could both use each other following my dad's death. It's actually interesting, I don't think my dad felt this would work after the May incident... because in his eulogy... which my dad wrote a portion of... my dad told me he loved me and to "always be happy and make good decisions." My friends, my mom and myself immediately knew what/who he was referring to. He's verbally and emotionally abusive and heading down the other path, it seems.

I'm just concerned about the actual leaving portion. He's supposed to be leaving for work next week. My plan is to pack up my stuff the day he leaves/goes to the airport. I won't drive him to airport as I normally would "due to meetings". The next day the movers will come. He will come home the following day.

I am not sure how to tell him (do I call him once I've gotten my stuff out when he's still out of town?) or do I just wait for him to come home to a half empty house? I am moving out while he's gone as I don't know how he will react -- sometimes he screams and tells me I should move out and then 5 minutes later he's cuddling back up to me.

Any input is greatly appreciated as I try to extract myself from this relationship with my addict boyfriend.