Hi noTHX, sorry you're struggling. I was when I gave up alcohol, some days worse than others. Time is a great helper, just keep taking small steps, I know we can be inclined to want to rush things.
I see sharon with years of sobriety and I wish it were me. But, I know one day it will be with my sobriety the most important thing in my life at this time.
All the best, if you get a bit nervousness before the docs you may want to write down what you have to say to them. I get nervous and sometimes if I don't know how to say anything I wrote it down and give them the details on paper which once they've talked to me I can discuss it easier. Hope that makes sense.xxx