Thanks for the thoughts. DogonCarl hit it on the head. I not conflicted I just want to drink with these guys. I suppose what makes this different for me at this time is I have had a drinking problem for a long time. It did not really show until I retired 2 years ago. It was always a "concern" which needed to be "addressed" at a later time.
Have had the problem for a long time, and only in the last month have I decided to address the problem. Don't get me wrong, I have tried every, and I mean every plan to "cut back", from the amount of booze, the time to drink it, between drinks, the type, whisky, beer, vodka, wine, different alcoholic percentages of beers, and the list goes on and on. But after coming on this site, I found that I have to control the first one. I can still go out and have a couple of beers and stop. I can still not drink for a week. But I have noticed that as often as I try to taper, it eventually becomes full blown drinking. There is a cycle here and I need to break it. I just don't want an excuse to do it hard core for a weekend and then as was mentioned earlier, come back and say it was not what I planned it to be.
I appreciate the thoughts and comments. I will be back here after the weekend. I wont quit this site until I am where I need to be. I guess I feel pretty damn good about not drinking for a while and think I am making a lot of progress. I know this is a process, I am used to processes. I have never in my life done anything of value the first time. It takes a lot of commitment and hard work to get positive results.
One thing I am struggling with is I have been very successful by doing something, grinding it out, hard work, commitment, dedication, and being proactive. Yet the main problems I have in my life are not solved by DOING ANYTHING!! I just need to stop doing things. Stop drinking, stop eating too much, stop using nicotine. I cant get my head around these things yet, but will continue to think about it and try to get it under control. I thought not drinking would solve the weight issue and the nicotine issue as they all feed off of each other.
Sorry for the ramble, but my head is very full at this moment.
It is laughable, I can keep a family together, make money in the market, appear on the outside to be very successful, but I cant seem to STOP doing the things that only require "not doing it". It is hard to work 14 hours a day 7 days a week, it should not be hard to not drink and not eat too much. Perhaps my mind is simply "not right".
Thanks again.