Originally Posted by
gameofthrones10 
I have been dishonest with my therapist so he has no idea how bad things have gotten. I feel ashamed to tell him the truth. I know it's stupid to feel that way but I feel like I have failed him as well as myself.
This happens all the time and is perhaps the silliest thing I can think of...you are paying someone who cannot repeat what you tell him or her what you say for their expertise to help you. Lying to them is so counter productive. Be honest - therapist and Drs. have heard it all.
As for the call...its helpful to realize alcohol is not calling you. While a simple metaphor to explain the excuse, you are choosing to cope through a substance, alcohol in this case. It helps to begin being honest about what is going on.
I second Scott's suggestions regarding a meeting and being honest with your therapist.