Addiction is insanity. The good thing is it doesn't have to continue or be permanent. You have to want to be sober more than u want to drink. I know that's easier said than done. I also am a chronic relasper who suffers something terrible when I think a drink is what I need or want. It has taken a lot of losses in my life( drivers license twice, job, career, family friends, sense of self money, respect from others, health issues) to make me truly desire sobriety. What I have learned is that I really have to work a program and accept help from others. I have to be open and honest about my alcoholism. I'm not telling u what to do but I don't think u are going to stay sober in early recovery going out with people who drink. It's just to much temptation. You really have to build your sober muscles up first. And even after that you have to be on gaurd! You can choose blessings or curses, life or death. No matter what don't give up. I relasped a few times while seriously trying to stay sober but what I noticed was that with a program I didn't stay in the relaspe long maybe a day or 2 and I was able to get right back on the horse with encourage me from others in recovery prayer posting and reading here. You can do it but its going to take tenacity. This is one of the hardest things you will ever have to do.