I'm feeling a bit smug and elite to check in here. Which for some people could be bad, but honestly I need a little more self-
.
My Step 4 is linked:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-bracelet.html
For a time I was clearly blending Step 4 and 5. My sponsor is a gift from my HP and I trust her to speak with her about my faults and resentments and reviewing my Step 4 issues. We have already met once and it went really well and I felt very comfortable with her. I don't particularly hide from my faults. In fact my problem is I tend to see the world very negatively and heap caustic blame on myself that perhaps is not mine or entirely overblown. My counselor & my sponsor have helped me recognize this more fully than I have previously.
I imagine Step 5 is just letting go. Letting go of my fear of vulnerability. Letting me be me. Expressing how I honestly feel. Shaking my head and allowing myself to be imperfect. Deepening my trust in my HP and allowing her to lead. Some of this I have already started... Some of this is pretty personal and might not get written about here, but I wanted to make myself accountable & continue leaving a bread crumb for others. It is worth the journey through Step 4.