'Back in the day', we studied Composers including Igor Stravinsky. Stravinsky, as I recall [perhaps erroneously], stated that 'Absolute Freedom Is Absolute Structure'. What he did prior to composing was decide the length of his Composition; say, 15 minutes. He would decide if it was going to be in a more-evocative Minor Key, or a Major Key. He would decide the Instrumentation. Having decided all that, he felt he could then sit down and let the creative juices flow. This sounds counter-intuitive to 'Artistic Creation'. Many non-Musicians believe that someone like Eric Clapton or Joe Bonamassa just rip an astounding Guitar Lick w/o forethought. Not usually the case. They have carefully considered where they want an astounding Solo to go; rehearsed it; and can then run with it live. The [1.] Absolute Structure of advance planning allows [2.] subsequent Absolute Freedom in the Studio, or on Stage.
My point - and I do have one - is that this sort of Sober Absolute Structure in my Life likewise allows me Absolute Freedom. I can now just get on with it. Besides being a 'Science Guy', I love some of the concepts being discussed herein. Pragmatically, though, what makes me even available for contemplation
of these concepts is - wait for it - uninterrupted Sobriety. My effortless Firewall.
The time and energy expended in my carefully-orchestrated Drinking became, itself, it's own Black Hole. Mind you, this is not the Drinking; just the planning of it. Hiding the 1.75 L 'Handles' in a couple of places. Copping 'enough' of a buzz 24/7 to still kinda-function, and then dealing with the times I didn't have enough in my Stomach and 'blew past' my planned 'coping' BAC level just like a Mercedes blowing by an Exit on the Autobahn. Driven there, seen that. Planning which Liquor Stores opened the earliest around here. Planning ahead to buy that next Handle in advance. Alcohol Inventory Management. Pre-planning my Drinking in purported 'Moderation'. At the very least, it was quite like an Embezzler stealing Company Funds. The 'cover your Tracks' BS wears you down like a piece of Stone against a Shop Grinder.
Shaking so badly that I could barely complete a Form at a Clinic to be evaluated for - ta da - Alcohol-based Neuropathy is a sample of the lil conundrums I had to eliminate from my Life. It was all just
too effin' much work.
So, all this fascinating, moot, 'heady' discussion aside, I'm lazy in old age. Along with trying Drinking again, I might as well grab a 120 Volt, GFI-protected Circuit Wire to see if it trips off and prevents my Electrocution. One 'advantage' of going Sober after ~42 years of varied Drinking levels is to enjoy the sanguine satisfaction of just saying 'enough already'. I'm blissfully free of all the 'what if' Scenarios.
If I could return to Drinking - the point of which, for me, is to near or achieve Blackout - do I want to again expend such effort just in
planning my Drinking. The Money was never a problem. Astonishingly, no DUIs, as with many of my Pals. I never smashed a Vehicle. OK, one Taillight while picking up a Pizza. Or, wound up in the Emergency Room. Or, lost a 6 figure Salary Job. Or, wrecked my 37 year-old Marriage. I suspect that, in the Bell Curve representation of Drinkers, some can moderate. That makes Statistical 'sense'. They could just be out there successfully moderating. However, the proficient Alk in my Bathroom Mirror never has yet met one.
Sometimes, laziness is just intrinsically cool. It prevents you from mindlessly putting your Hand on a hot Stove Burner while asking: 'Gee, I wonder what's gonna happen
this time'? It's often possible for us to be 'too' smart for ourselves and challenge that which is best left alone.
It's common for Folks, including me, to cite their experience and extrapolate that to a larger Sample Population. So, I'm always mindful of sticking with my personal 'Sample of One' illustrations. They mean nothing beyond me. This, and other Logical Fallacies, are linked here; one of my favorite lil Websites.
Logical Fallacies