I really Enjoyed this post, thanks FT
I am not an alcoholic or even a problem drinker, my DOC was gambling so that is where my response is coming from.
For me contemplating gambling again is just a healthy part of how I live in recovery and it isn't some kind of addictive voice conspiracy to get me back in action.
When I consider things I consider them pragmatically, so abstinence isn't for me an achievement but a result of thinking about how I want to live.
Most mornings to varying degrees I muse as you have done FT, I don't fear asking questions of myself and come at things for the most part from a. Neutral stance I guess you could call it Curious Contemplation.
This kind of approach is open, fresh, cool and calm. When a thought comes to mind about something like Moderation Management, I try and look at it from all angles I do some research (thanks google) I become aware of my initial re-coil to the idea of MM and see how Abstinence Only is kind of indoctrinated into my psyche. I challenge myself as much as possible to see past pre-conceived ideas. Taking this kind of curious observer stance I then can usually weigh things up based on Reality not Belief.
For example I would write down what the best case scenario would be if I tried a moderation approach and then Took a Bet, and I would write down what the worst case scenario would be.
Weighing in with my own evidence of experience, and being totally honest the worst case scenario is also the most likely outcome. In other words I have little or no evidence that moderation has ever worked or even been attractive to me and piles and piles if evidence that when I gambled (starting at small and moderated amounts and times) I was completely unsatisfied unless I was going all the way.
Therefore I have chosen abstinence because I like Living and like Life clear of self inflicted drama and suffering.