mother to mother here mer... i would say don't report it but let him know you really struggled with the decision. (you would also have to file a police report)
i came close a few weeks ago and really struggled with the decision. and he knew i was this close to doing it. the fact that i might have had him sent to jail shook him to his core. i was beside myself with hurt from his betrayal and spoke openly to him about everything i was feeling... i also changed a lot of boundaries once i decided not to report to po, which has been all to the good so i feel it was the right decision for us.
the main reason i decided not to report his infraction is because he really is making progress in his recovery and i just know jail time would sabotage this. that may not be the case with your son?
it was also a minor infraction compared to $3000, so glad she can get her camera back. the betrayal and loss of trust is the bigger loss IMHO and something i am finally completely open with my son about. i spoke with my therapist at length and one thing he really strongly imprinted on me - protect ourselves. having an objective sounding board has been invaluable to me in sorting through this mess addiction brings to our lives. he suggested a padlock on my bedroom door and i told him if it got that bad he would be out. i couldn't have gotten that clarity without the objective conversation.
whether they get it or not is up to them. protecting ourselves from the addiction behaviors is up to us. it sucks. i also felt in my case that not reporting is part of my detaching. alanon is a life line for my sanity... he is dealing with consequences in his life and home life because of the impact this incident has had on me. no more, he knows i. am. done. if he is meant to go to jail he'll screw up himself and put himself there...
i don't know your back story hon but i do know each of us fight this battle in ways that fit the circumstances... personally i am finding that by refusing to catch him when he falls has prompted him to take responsibility. he's an adult and addiction or not he must be accountable for his actions. both to me and society.
are you taking care of yourself? separating myself from the chaos has allowed me to reclaim my life. i am not the addict and i will no longer be torn down by his addiction. detaching with love is what it is all about for me. alanon, the book Codependent No More, therapy have led me to doing what i want without concern for what ifs... what if he..., what if i'm needed...,
i go to the beach when i want, i spend my money on myself, i sleep in, i go to the lake and bird watch - seems silly but when i was obsessing that was allll i did, 24/7, obsess about his problems. no more. i. am. done.
can you tell i relate to your situation?!! keep reading here, keep posting, you are not alone. isolation just worsened my situation and SR helped me get my balance. i now have much support in real life too but SR is still where i find the most understanding... sending a strong, warm hug to you...