If drinking is causing problems in your life then it's time to cut alcohol out of your life if you can't control what happens when you drink, I used to drink a few pints go home and that was fine, never hurt anyone, but as the years went on I drank more and more and my behaviour got worse and worse, so it was time to make a few changes as I couldn't go and have my few pints anymore, I had to drink until drunk, the first drink became my problem, so that effectively meant Sobriety was the answer.
Also I found people have their own problems and their own lives, they don't want to be around people that cause a scene or have rowdy behaviour when out for a quiet night for a few drinks. Alcohol can isolate and leave a person on their own very quickly due to their actions following alcohol.
The whys, the ins and outs of things though is not very important, you need to sort out your drinking as it sounds like it is causing some real problems in your life, the theories of alcohol could be talked about for years, but getting down to making the changes should be the priority!!