Thanks everyone for responding when I just needed a friend who truly understands. I did end up going during lunch to my son's condo. I was so sad and really wanted to cry but I didn't, not to mention when I found out I was at work (and I never let personal stuff get the best of me at work…somehow I am able to compartmentalize it all, it if makes any sense…even with a broken heart). When I got there, he opened the door. He's never rude or yells or anything which is good. I just told him that I cannot do this anymore and he has to make a choice on whether he wants to live clean or not. I asked him to leave if he does not plan on being proactive and doing something about his problem. Later he did text message me and explained that he was late and that was why he was discharged but I just responded by saying that he is responsible for making sure that he does everything he needs to do if he is committed to his recovery because I can't, and that I was just too tired. My daughter is 21 yo and goes to college and works. She is his roommate and wants him to get clean. We talked a little about the situation, and I decided to not contact him in the meantime because I had told him I don't want to her any excuses anymore to either clean or not.
I am not sure what my next step is. For this evening, I plan on not thinking too much about it and focusing on my daughter a bit. She is studying for some exams because she is taking four summer classes (I'm proud of her) and she wanted to bounce some ideas with me. I truly enjoy schooling and helping give advice where needed and wanted.
Thank you so much for being there for me today. I guess I was lucky I had a meeting right after lunch which ran long and helped me take my mind off things.