I read this yesterday and think it's appropriate to post here. "You have to deal with what is, not what you wish it might become." I saw that on Dr. Laura's site yesterday. A friend follows her on FB, I don't normally pay attention but that one struck me because so many of us say how the addict in our lives is this wonderful person when sober, blah, blah. The reality is, they are no longer that same person and we have to deal in the NOW.
This year will be a challenge, however, I bet you will find the same thing I did. The challenges are not nearly as many as when you were together. I too would pack up the kids and do basically anything to get out of the house, if he was drunk or sober. The eggshells I was walking on was making me a miserable and unstable person.
Keep your boundaries firm. Try to move forward and enjoy some life. Be kind to you. His family will tire of him and try to get you involved again, or that is what I saw. I also saw bitterness from them when I refused, which hurt me at first, but eh...they know the truth, so do I.
Tight Hugs. Thank you for the update.
Take Care!