Hi Mentium - sorry for being a bit slow getting to this thread, but I'd only twigged you'd busted from your most recent one.
I just want to say that I SOOO get it, when you spoke about sort of feeling like you'd failed simply because of having the urge / craving to drink...even if you didn't actually pick up. I truly understand that. It is really wacky, isn't it?!
Dunno about you, but for me, it might stem from when I've had major cravings, and literally given in to them...despite all that I 'knew' about what to do for them to pass. One option is, as others have mentioned: that hundred pound gorilla called the phone :-)
Even now that I have a new sponsor, after returning from serious relapses (needing rehabs etc), I STILL don't call her if I feel ansty or feel a trigger moment - which I did only today. And I don't call anyone else either.
You and I can both work on that one, eh?
All the very best to you
Vic