im sure most here can relate. simply put, the drug is doing more harm than benefit. i got to the point that everything in between drinking was just something i felt i had to endure. so actual happy moments werent happening.
have you declared that you are quitting? it really is different than taking a break. declareing this to my spouse and family was one of the hardest things i ever did. it messed up my pride, and told everyone i wasnt to be seen with a drink again. absolutely horrifying!
for years i avoided this because i fear any admission of weakness. i also wanted to be able to have one in public!
now, three plus months out, i look at these thoughts and cuss myself for not doing it sooner. its like taking a new drug. one that works! good day, bad day, i NEVER wake up and think "damn, i should have drank last night..."