Right now I am going by prayer and instinct. I'm living in the moment, for today. Nothing is in my control, I'm no longer trying to fix anything, and I'm having profound realizations of faith. Life is far from perfect and yet I've never felt so at peace.
I've written about a lot of different things I've gone through, and my viewpoint seems to be often changing. Each viewpoint reveals some of the truth, but not all of it. His alcoholism has hurt the kids, my illnesses have also hurt them and yet there has been much good that's come from our family. Our story is far from over. Progress, not perfection.
I truly don't expect anyone to understand as I don't even know how write about this. I do sincerely appreciate ALL the support, the caring and the prayers.