It doesn't matter if he is an "alcoholic" or not. His drinking is causing problems in the marriage. From everything I've read of your posts, he is abusive regardless of weather or not he is addicted to alcohol. He is "forceful" when the real word for it is abusive.
We cannot tell you what to do, but we can read your posts and recognize things that maybe you are just too close to the situation to see. All I can say is take the utmost care of yourself and your children. Don't let him "force" you to do something you don't feel comfortable with.
Change is hard, but if you want anything to change, you are going to have to be the one to do it.