First of all, props to Dee for noticing the parallel between Torn's feelings after meeting with the AA based therapist and her triggering IOP experience. You are amazing.
Torn - I hate to see you triggered by folks whose role it is to help you. It's perfectly acceptable to be resistant to AA. Many people are, who wind up recovering long term using a hybrid of approaches. You strike me as a practical, solution oriented person, who wants advice not platitudes.
Fabl - I'm sorry to hear you're caught in a loop of negativity with your ex boyfriend. Sometimes, for me, it's easier to focus on drama than deal with the underlying causes of my unhappiness. From a practical standpoint, it doesn't make sense to put effort into a relationship that sabotages your sobriety.