Hi guys, haven't posted in a while but I have been checking in and hanging on by a thread. It is one if those rare nights that I have the house to myself. I really do like being alone, but in this situation it makes me wish I could be with my ex. Which of course made me want to drink. I really considered it, but like you torn, I recognized HALT --- and I ate, bought myself some magazines I enjoy, and I'm in bed with my dogs. I'm seeing my counselor tomorrow and I really think that is the main reason I didn't cave tonight.
I have loved so many of your posts this week and want to respond and thank many of you, but that will have to wait til tomorrow when I'm on my laptop and in a better frame of mind.
Just a lot of stuff rattling around in my head. Haven't heard a peep from my ex bf in over two weeks and it frustrates and hurts me terribly. I know I just need to let it go. I know i will hear from him eventually, but I'm so tired of all this waiting and back and forth. I honestly don't even know what it is that I want. I want him, but so often once I have him, I feel pressured and pull away. I just need to focus on myself and let the rest work itself out.
Looking forward to summer but also scared of all that free time. So conflicted about so many things.