The "poor me" thing?
No one could be more Poor Me than me.
I started drinking after an 18 year sobriety. I started drinking because my entire family has died (they were older, it was just their time.) Then I found out I had a life threatening disease. Then I lost my job. Then the economic crash took half my savings. Then my cat died. All in just a few years. I never got a chance to recover from one death before another happened. Then I lost my boyfriend and my best friend of 20 years. (It was way past time on both, but still big losses.) All of this in four or five years time. I'm single with no kids and it can suck at times.
So when I went to AA it was all I could do to keep from crying all the way through every single meeting. I have cried through two entire meetings - one of them my first meeting. I still cry two months later. I haven't gotten it all out yet, and it may take more time.
At one meeting I cried - loudly - for about five minutes, with my head in my lap. I got a lot of well-wishers coming up to me afterwards. I was mortified, "I don't want people to feel sorry for me."
One woman said, "It's compassion." Wow. I had not felt compassion from anyone in years. YEARS. That was the start of me looking at things differently. People want to help. It makes them feel better and it makes me feel better. I still fight the tears, I'm afraid to really let them start. I don't know if that will stop at some point when I find someone I trust or if I'll always keep some of this inside. Seems unhealthy to not talk about it and not cry about it, but I guess it will work itself out in God's time.