Strong cravings to be unstressed
Day 12 sober
Need venting
I'm so very stressed these days
Yesterday I saw the movie BarFly. It's romanticizing drinking bigtime, in the low-life kind of way
A part of me could see the destructive pathetic truth about it..
But I also kept thinking.. why can't I just drink and be like them again. I can't deal with this. I don't feel free now
Constantly using will power is not a way of living
Drinking would unstress me, relax me, make me feel good, set me free. Well, for some hours anyway
I will not give in.. but the dark force is strong now
Help