Originally Posted by gettingbetter64

I feel pathetic even writing this,I haven't posted in awhile because I haven't exactly been sober and I'm embarrassed to even post this. I know if I continue drinking I will get a DUI or DWI or worse. I broke the screen on my phone on Tuesday due to drinking. I've been a daily drinking for about 5-6 years, I have gone to AA a handful of times but I would always get so nervous I would leave. I've heard AA working for so many different people so maybe I should give it another try. I eventually give in and drink for every excuse you get think of, the biggest one is sadness and loneliness and feeling like I deserve a drink. I apologize for the rant I know I could be trying harder to not drink I feel so much hate towards myself because of my alcoholism. I really don't have any support around me, no one knows how bad my drinking has become. This is my day 2, I feel like I'm wasting everyone's time by posting because I keep on drinking and I don't want to trigger anyone. I just felt like it was needed.