All that stuff you're saying about yourself... AV talk. Don't listen to that S.O.B.! IT thrives on your feelings of hopelessness, self-doubt, failure, etc. As long as you are lost in this fog of despair, IT counts on you returning to the thing you know: alcohol. And that's all IT wants. IT doesn't care about you. But you do care about you. That's why you've come here. Don't let IT keep you wallowing in this pit you're in. Stand up. You know you can. If going to AA is what you feel you need to do, by all means, do it ASAP. If going to a doctor to get yourself checked out is what you feel you should do, do that. Do something, but don't drink. As soon as you make the decision to put alcohol behind you and take action, I guarantee you'll start feeling better.
As I've heard others say around here: Nothing changes if nothing changes.
BTW, I can relate to breaking the screen on your phone. I did the same thing in a drunken fit of rage just a few weeks before I quit. Always doing dumb **** when I drank...