Hi GoldenBear and welcome to SR! You are not alone and definitely not weird -- I think many of us here have had very similar experiences. I started drinking for the same reasons, it gave me a sense of independence and it turned me into the social butterfly I'd always wanted to be. But the reality was much different than that -- I turned into an embarrassing lush with horrible black outs and hangovers.
It's been a long journey since I quit for the first time just over a year ago, but I'm starting to like who I am sober -- I bet you will like yourself too
