Courtney I'm so sorry you're feeling so down.
In your post you say that you love your ABF. When I read it all I can think of is why?
You're miserable, and he treats you horribly. This seems to be the nature of relationships with As. You deserve to be with someone who treats you like his princess! Someone who loves you like you love him.
Keep reading and posting here as much as you like. It really helps. We're all here for you.
Hugs!