Not the mama....that is heartbreaking and I am so so sorry. Hugs to you.
I stayed. I had plans to end it at the end of January.
But then my then drinking H had an affair and I found out December 30. Something snapped in me, something snapped in him. He has not had a drink since that day. We are in therapy weekly. He has never been unkind, or violent, ever....that is why I stayed for as long as I did. The affair just about killed me. He was a very depressed man with an array of secrets and those secrets and the alcohol fed off of each other. Now...we are the best we have ever been, together. Once a secret sees the light of day, things often change. It's too early to know if it will remain like this forever, just about four months, but I am glad I stayed.
I would not encourage others to do so, not with an alcoholic. Believe it or not, betrayal is easier to treat if your partner is willing and the betrayed can get through it, it's not easy.