I finally left. I tried and tried because I thought I was doing what was best for my children. Then I decided that I do not want my children to grow up and think that this is a normal marriage. I understand having a toddler would complicate things. If you are thinking of leaving I can tell you what my attorney told me, journal every single thing with times, dates, photos, any evidence you can gather up. You will need it for a costody battle.
I waited until my kids were older, they are 8 and 14. I have alot of anxiety over his time with them but am educating them best I know how. I hope you get an attorney who can advise you and a therapist who can guide you.
Tight Hugs. God Bless.