SoberChristy

I had both great experiences and terrible ones. I'm sure many of you remember my post on Nov. 18th of 2013–the day I entered rehab. I said that I would document my experience, but with the fog that I was in I neglected to think of the fact that I probably wouldn't have internet access, which I didn't.

I hated it at first, mostly because I was craving, but I told myself it was because I felt confined. It was an in-patient facility. After a few weeks I started to do quite well, but ultimately relapsed three times during my 78 day stint. The first was on an outing with my mom (I snuck away), during the second I snuck out of an AA meeting (no one ever even noticed) and the third was on my first overnight outing. I still felt like by time I left I was ready to give up alcohol for good.

I relapsed the day I left and drank for a week straight alone in my apartment in the city. I ultimately called the treatment center, got taken back and gave up everything (my job, apartment and life in the city) to move a state away to live closer to the facility. After an additional 28 day stay I entered a sober living house.

I was happier than I had ever been in my life (or so I thought), until I relapsed AGAIN. I got kicked out of my house in the middle of the night. I freaked out and drove another state away while I slept in my car. I ended up going back to my mother's house where I continued to drink and ended up in the ER twice in one week. I called the treatment center and after a few conversations they refused any of my additional calls.

Right now I have almost 48 hours and craving again.