Originally Posted by
Confused39 
Today is a day where I want to curl up in a ball I don't know how I am going to get through this and the pain, anger and emptiness becomes worse it doesn't feel it will ever get better!
((((hugs)))))
It's okay not to know the answers yet. Take your time and start working on your own recovery.
I know those days and have been there. I've had times where I felt best crawled up in a ball on my closet floor. It was comforting and dark. I wished I could just slip away from life. Now I'm embracing the light, even when my eyes are closed in the middle of the night, whether I'm happy or sad, lost or finding my way. I have moments of being lost instead of months of feeling that way. I now can recognize when I'm not taking care of me and, somehow, amazingly, somewhere along the line I figured out HOW to take care of me and now the rest of life is falling into place.
A good place to start is here at SR and in 12 step meetings, both Alanon and Celebrate Recovery. Therapists who deal with addictions can be of great help also, and there are other avenues of recovery. You don't need to know which route to take or how to get there. Start taking baby steps and keep moving. It'll start to come together. If it doesn't, post for help. Support is here for you. Have you been to any meetings or counseling?
You've already started reaching out. Looking back, that very first step was actually the hardest of all for me.
http://al-anonuk.org.uk/