Thanks for responding guys. Its been 14 almost 15 months since I've known him again ( we used to hang out when we were 15 and 16). You're right about the relapses. True relapses have been about 10-12. He would call the others slips. My other friends and my family think I'm insane for sticking by him. I know it's mad after the danger I've been in sometimes. He's a binger through and through. His cocaine use is bad, but he'll only drink and drug together never just one at a time. One problem he has with me is that I don't lie to him or just tell him what he wants to hear to keep him calm or stop him feeling the reality of his behaviour. I've had people tell me that if he's been abusive, threatening or cruel I shouldn't tell him how I feel because he already feels bad enough. So when he tells me he's cut his wrists open and he's losing consciousness where he's lost so much blood and I'm a "c*nt", only for me to panic like mad, drop everything and find him only to discover he was making it all up, I'm supposed to just forgive and forget? I know my path is clear. I'm just scared to walk it. I've been a friend to him, but I don't really know what he has been to me...