DG - sorry to hear about the situation. it sounds like you may be dealing with a short-term pain, long-term gain scenario. If he really cares for you then he can always give up the booze and pot, right? I get what you mean about partners in crime, but the fun times sound like they were over a while ago. At some point we all have to grow up, and realize that life isn't one never ending party. Maybe he will get there someday and you can be partners in sobriety.
It is great that you are putting yourself and your sobriety first.