EmmyG

My mother-in-law's attitude toward me has changed somewhat. I could be misinterpreting, but I feel like she thinks I'm abandoning her son when he's "sick." I know he wants to separate, too. The other night while he was drunk (I believe I mentioned this already), he texted my mom weird stuff, that she was beautiful, etc. Last night he said, "I knew you'd find out and it would make you angry enough to leave me finally." He doesn't want to face his problems, and I think he just wants to be alone now, too.

I know we say "in sickness and in health," and I take marriage very seriously. I was raised in a very strict religion, and it was really emphasized to me growing up that you only leave if your husband is (1) unfaithful or (2) physically abusive. Well, he has been physically abusive. That I know for sure. And more and more often lately, he's not in his right mind. He says it's crazy that I think he would ever hurt me, because he'd die for me, and he'd never take it that far even drunk. I know the truth is he doesn't want to see that part of himself as real.

Anyway, I know his mother is afraid that he'll be completely alone when I'm gone and she'll have to worry about him overdoing it and killing himself. Don't you think that this is the ONLY thing I can do for him, leave him? I've done everything else - begged, pleaded for him to get help, stood by him, supported him, forgiven him. I would have to give up my own life completely to be able to stay in the marriage. I've given seven years. I know to her, you never break up a family, but this is his choice. Sucks to be made to feel like the bad guy when I'm the one who has been here dealing with his crazy antics alone, all this time.