Lily, you need to do what you need to do.
You get this, you know jail is just that band-aid. You know he will need to adjust, re acclimate to not being told what to do from minute to minute, that he will need to become productive again for himself. I think making it known that he can't come home now because that is what you want is ok and will give him time to look at other options.
But you also can choose to allow him right home ...
Remember it isn't about him, but YOU. Keep it about you and the decisions are so much easier to make.
Take care.