Hi WSB - welcome
I was a gigging muso for many years - Carl's right in that playing for beer is a mugs game.
I know the pressures to drink in that kind of environment. I knew I had a problem but ai couldn't say no to a beer. I could have found sober support...I could have taken some time off to get myself together, maybe even go to rehab...but I didn't...I just kept on drinking...and I lost my career.
No matter how good you are noone wants to play with a guy who's too drunk to play from the second set, or even too drunk to make it the gig.
You have some big decisions to make WSB - but you're not alone here - you'll find tons of support