Hi Jaybe. Ditto all the above advice.
I think most of us have fallen into a destructive cycle such as:
Waking up with a hangover and full of regret,
Right, this is it I won't let it happen again,
I must "man-up and be strong,
Spend all day trying to be strong,
Getting weary of trying to be strong,
Oh f*** it this is too hard I'm too weak,
Feel bad about being weak,
Have just one drink.......................... next thing
Waking up with a hangover and full of regret.
You have to break the cycle.
For me it was accepting that where substances are concerned I'm not strong, I'm weak. So i let them win.
It sounds contradictory, but once you give in you are free.
It's not a fair fight.
All right booze, you win I give up, I'm not going to fight you anymore.
You're just a beast that lives within me. I'm FAR weaker than you, but........................
I control my hand that picks up a drink, not you,
I decide whether I'm going to buy booze, not you,
I decide whether I want to be clean and sober, not you,
I decide whether i want to be happy and content, not you,
See these legs that can walk us to the pub? I control them, not you.
Now know you're place beast. You live within me, but now you're safely within yous cage.