My mother took me to the doctor a few weeks ago, went in with me, and told them I was having a nervous breakdown and that I needed help. Really I was having an anxiety attack, but it got the ball rolling. The doctors office (who are wonderful) set me up with a therapist who specializes in dealing with families with addiction in their lives. I have only went once for two hours, but it was a great start. The therapist and the doctors office are working together as I do need medication and they are updating each other, etc.
While it feels a little extreme to have this panel of people assigned to me (it is two people at the doctors office and the therapist), it is also a relief to just be getting help. The correct medication is helping also. I have tried in the past to find my own therapist, but this time I just went in and turned it all over to the doctors office and they took care of everything.
I encourage you to reach out. This helped me feel so much more in control of my life and helped me see I am not quite the mess I was thinking I am. It also helps to have a support system with my family. The therapist confimed that also, that recovery from anything is very hard to do, almost impossible, without a wide support system.
Tight Hugs, please get some help so you feel better and more in control of your own life. You can do this.