I too am the wife of a HFA. One thing that helped me was to educate myself on the disease of alcoholism. Read, read, read all that you can about it. I realized HFA (high functioning alcoholic) is just a stage. It doesn't last and eventually the person becomes less and less functioning as the disease progresses. No one can predict when that will happen but for all alcoholics, if untreated it will get worse.
That being said you found the right place. All of us here have someone we love that has the same disease. You will find great knowledge and support here. One of the best things you can do for yourself is to join Al-anon and get to a meeting in your area.
Welcome, and feel free to share about your life and questions younhave whenever you are ready.