Day 1, again.
This is my first time posting, but I really enjoyed reading the other posts and feel that maybe having some additional accountability might keep me on the straight. My boyfriend sent me the link and I didn't really think that I would gain anything, but wow, there are people who are dealing with the same issues I am (who would have thought). I have been drinking excessively for the last 3 or so years and have been with my boyfriend for almost two. Since September, I have been trying and failing to quit. I always make excuses of why it's ok this time and then it turns into a five day binge. Once the binge is over, I hate myself. I have wasted so many days of my life that I can never get back. My boyfriend pretty much gave me an ultimatum today and it should make me want to quit, right? I love him more than anything, but when I feel that I can't drink, I want to that much more. I want help so bad. I don't want to be driven by this disease, but I don't know how to get a handle on things and deal with the cravings without always giving in. I could really use some words of advice and support. I have never taken a step like this and I am hoping trying something different will be a push in the right direction.