Originally Posted by
mbbe 
Have ever only done this for family. Have never not still wanted to drink. Any help on finding that thing that will make this seem like something I can tolerate forever...
Till you are ready to quit, truly ready, and can accept
never drinking again without regrets, you'll likely drink. I doubt that there is anything I can say that's going to click the switch on in your head and make you say, "You're absolutely right, Carl, doggone it, I'm going to quit drinking."
I can say that once you do quit drinking, FOR YOU, and accept not drinking, and get on the path of recovery, that it's a lot easy staying sober than it is to be enslaved to alcohol. I love being free of booze.