And for what it's worth, I think being considered a "mean mom" probably means you're doing a few things right considering that your AH and you SIL are working against you. Kids don't need their parents to be their friends, they need their parents to teach them responsibility, consequences, humility and kindness. That's how they turn out to be good contributing members of society. My MIL insists that I'm "no fun" because I won't allow my 2 year old to eat fast food. Uh huh, yes, eating fast food is loads of fun. Not!