good advice from Sugarbear. If we wait till we have that relationship to work the steps...we might find we don't get it, we keep floundering around.
Working the steps is the program. We don't have to know how to do them, or how they work to do them. Like learning to read, we do it by jumping in and learning as we go.
Also, trust the process and trust that your HP will reveal itself as you go. Don't have to know what it is, looks like or how it operates in order to do the steps. Don't have to use someone else's HP or think yours will be like theirs. Stay open minded and willing.
Welcome to recovery, it's awesome.