First of all: You should NOT marry this guy until he is out and has 2 more years of sobriety without relapses. Again this is AFTER he gets out. 2 years.
To your questions, his sobriety is not dependent on anything you have asked about. What you say just isn't on the radar to keep him sober or not. You'll need to give him space to attend meetings and work with other addicts.
Alanon or naranon are the AA/NA programs for the friends and family of alkies/addicts. You should consider going to their meetings.