Originally Posted by
animalnurse9 
Is weird.but I feel like I'm praying for something really bad to happen while I'm drinking. Something so catastrophic that it would be impossible to continue.how awful and blasphemous is that
I used to think that way too, though it was more often an expectation than a wish. So I got what I wanted...A near-death experience with my internal organs on the verge of shutting down.
My medical problems cleared up after only a few months of sobriety.
If you wait for something catastrophic to happen, it probably will.