Thanks for the advice, much of the addicts problem is enablers and well meaning friends and family. I'm not going into this as a novice and, like many here, have been dealing with addictions for a lifetime. If tough-love, coddling, whatever, worked for everyone we wouldn't have addition problems and just apply the recipe for success.
There is no yelling, pushing, whatever in this case, I agree it is a waste of time. We've presented her with a few choices, and the consequences, ball's in her court. I'm prepared to do everything from helping her get treatment to asking her to leave the home with no support. Thus far, she's thinking a good choice would be rehab, we agree, and want to get moving on this before she "re-evaluates". She's admitted to a problem, asked for help, I can't just say we're helping by going to Al-anon; that isn't helping her and I've been through the program in the past.
I have no problem letting her do the leg work finding a place. She's asked for help, so, we're helping without making it our problem. I'd like to have a short list for her, some feedback on what works and what doesn't, knowing that if the person doesn't want help, no program is going to fix what's broken.