Crash AVRT
You do not drink, you are a sober woman who is appreciated by her boss and just got a bonus.
Now your beast/disease/alcoholism wants to get blasted. That nagging little voice making you jealous is your addictive voice (your AV). It wants to drink but you do not drink. This is not you.
When that thought comes again, address it mentally and state:
I do not drink and this is not negotiable.
Separate you Charlie from the AV.
PS: and bail out asap