Hey Jend, Well I've been up all night, worrying about things I cannot fix or change. Why did i do that? I kept wondering why or what was the trigger that turned my children so much against authority? Hummm...and what was the trigger that turned my love for them away and into a different direction? Does that make sense? If we take the drugs out of the picture, what is left? Emotions (raw), control, self esteem, again things I cannot fix or change? They used to be perfect, in my eyes only, now the arguing, lying and steeling have
entered the picture.
It's almost like they are gone, lost forever to me and the family. What is left is only their bodies, bodies that they have abused this past year or so.
Today, again, I will try to stay calm and not get baited, like a fish in a shallow pond. No more Mrs. Mom I'm afraid. Yesterday afternoon was proof of that. I'm not gonna be mean, but I will be firm and consistent, like I should of been last been last night and all along.
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