Hi frustrated-
Wow what a lot to take in about your wife.
It seems that you have a lot that has happened in a very short time. I am imagining that not only would you feel like you don't know your wife, but you probably don't know up from down and right from left.
I am curious about how you are feeling right now about all of this that you have been through?
I often felt when in a similar spot dealing with addiction that I had to make ALL of these huge decision in a five minute period. I really was not capable of making those kind of huge decisions in my life in such a short period of time.
Welcome, glad you are here.