Jen and Twofish, my heart goes out to both of you. Jen I did not like the idea of my son moving back in either and he too has a lot of debt with creditors calling, etc. The manipulation and trying to wear you down is so draining. I find if I am calm and clloected and put my foot down and walk away he knows I am dead serious. I realize girls sometimes never know when to quit and will go on and on (my daughter always had to have the last word, even if it was a half hour later). You both need to sit down and set firm boundaries but stick to them. I know it is so hard when we see our beautiful children hurting but it is for their own good. Giving in only hurts and hinders their progress. Time for them to be responsible for themselves. Mine has a job. He only makes 10.00 an hour and works 32 hours but at least is is something. He is slowly saving up a little bit. I wish you both the best trying to get some peace for yourselves but holding firm on your boundaries as well. Yes, it is much harder on US but in the long run you will help them become self sufficient. Big hugs to both of you!