Originally Posted by
Mirage74 
Yea, my sister sounds a lot like yours but she is 6 yrs older. She still tries to treat me like her little brother even though I am a grown man! We are constantly arguing and she refuses to take any responsibility-it's always my fault and she's not doing anything, even though I'm the one who feels harassed. It's pretty sick, at least on her part. I just want it to stop. I'm pretty easy-going and like to get along with people but if she's around she's buzzing all over the place, gossiping, getting angry, talking behind your back. I really think it's some mental condition there. I really think it will come to a yelling match which is scary, cause the last time she called the police on me. She will do anything just to win, even though she's wrong, and I just want her to leave me alone. She is renting out space rent free in my head, I want her evicted!
How far do you live from them? Can you simply not answer the phone? Block e-mails? On what grounds did she call the police?
One thing I have long since learned is that yes, it will always be someone else's fault, in the eyes of these people. There is absolutely no way to change that. There is simply nothing to do other than limit contact as much as you can. Don't even try to talk about these things.
As to evicting her--what are your other interests? Do you have things you enjoy doing? Do you keep a gratitude list? The best thing I ever did for myself was start a 'bucket list' at 43things.com and then start pursuing it. You have to look at your own life, and decide what you want to leave behind, what you want to have to show for the life you have, and then start doing those things. Among other things, I sponsor two children and an elderly, bedridden man through a program. I'm showing my children the better way to live. I'm helping someone. My life matters.
And nothing my parents or sisters do can take that away from me, or my children, or these people.
Me, I want to put something good in the world. Yes, my parents and siblings hurt me, but if I can put something good in the world, it matters a whole lot less than it would have otherwise, had I done nothing for anyone, and let them convince me I'm that worthless, inept, and messed up.
Because I started looking at my own life rather than spending my days thinking about them, I have met many wonderful people who see me for who I really am.
And I do realize it's easier said than done. My nephew (I posted about him last May) showed up on my property a few days ago. Came with my daughter. I told him unless he had an apology, he needed to get off my property. He did so (ie, wasn't about to apologize), there was no further confrontation, but my sister, who clearly heard me refer to his vulgar language in question, stood around and did nothing. The adults (so-called adults) are a huge part of why he thinks he can behave like that. (Oh, wait, he DID behave like that! And he and I both know they'll either ignore it or high-five him.)
Yeah, I'm mad. Yeah, it's taking up space in my head. (Here I am talking about it, lol.) But a whole lot less than it would have several years ago.